I’ve been watching the new, “Loki” show lately and I acquired a term that I intend to steal within the last episode. Sorry if this is a spoiler but at one point Kang announces that they have “passed the threshold.” In the show this means that Kang, the all-powerful keeper of the “sacred timeline,” moved from a position of omniscience to that of an ordinary observer as the timeline branches into infinite unknowns. This feeling is similar to how I felt around the period of my cognitive awakening in junior year of highschool. We’ve discussed in detail the lack of nuance I displayed around my social skills leading to what many would identify as arrogance. However, I’ve also broken down the greater field of vision developed in recent years that allows me to utilize these talents for a collective good, or at least try. This transition occurred only after I “passed the threshold” within my own timeline. Given my upbringing in a small, predictable pool of people and events, I developed a heightened sense of my own ability to quite literally predict the future. It was some warped manifestation of LaPlace’s Demon in which I believed the actions of my peers and social structure of my environment were so easily defined that through simple pattern recognition I could effectively narrow down the list of possible outcomes to a handful of hypothetical results with relative accuracy. It wasn’t until my mother got cancer that I had to seriously reconsider my relationship with the universe and come face-to-face with the shattering realization that I have no idea what the fuck was going on. This nexus event (hehe) coupled with a few other untimely bummers dealt to me by the unknown powers of the cosmos led to an aggressive confrontation with my own Being. So far, my council with the powers of the unknown as well as my own self have led me to a few reconsiderations, the one I wish to discuss today is the human relationship to the act of assuming.
One of the earliest memories I have of pondering my intermingling with assumptions was the result of a conversation with my brother. In this interaction, I recall discussing with him the Cottmeyer family’s place in the universe and by extension my own. At this time of life he was skeptical, to say the least, about the fortitude of our familial wellbeing for an extended amount of time. I vividly remember telling him something to the effect of, “Yeah, but in my experience, things just tend to work out.” This comical attitude of youthful invincibility was quickly stifled by the budding wisdom only an older brother can truly encompass. His response to me was essentially, “Oh you just wait and see,” and if you knew me at the time you know my internal reaction was pretty much, “whatever old man!” What I really said back to him must not have been of much substance considering I don’t remember any more of that conversation. However, that one excerpt stuck with me in the back of my head until he was proven right and has since been burned into the very code of my brain. It was the first time I even considered there was any reason to challenge the assumption that, for Noah Cottmeyer, things tend to go pretty smoothly and in accordance to how I’d like them to. I have done an immense amount of soul-searching as to the factors that could lead to such an attitude in one’s adolescence, but that’s another discussion for another day. For now, I’d like to adhere to the core phenomenon that was the root cause of such a perspective on the universe: assumptions.
As I discussed in my last post, I’ve been putting off writing this post for some time now. Not because I lack passion about its subject matter, but rather every time I think about formatting this post I go down the rabbit hole. The reason for this is that assumptions go much deeper than we can even comprehend. I am going to make an attempt at providing a structure that is capable of intellectual consumption but no promises. For the past week or so I’ve been thinking about assumptions that we make on a daily basis from the world scale all the way to our own “self.” Every time that I find one that is worth talking about it breaks into a fractal of assumptions that compose the greater assumption. Therefore, even when starting at the most general, relatable scale I find myself spiraling into hyper magnification of the universe which is rarely a beneficial exercise, especially not for writing a comprehendable paper.
It is for this reason that I want to begin with the widest, most unifying assumption that has ever existed and creates the basis for all actions on planet earth. This assumption of course is the one that we all make every day when we wake up: That we will not die today. The most humbling force that unites myself to the cute girl at the gym and Pope Francis alike is that we will all die. However, I would argue that most people upon waking up, are not cognitively aware that based on simple statistics any given day has an equal likelihood of being the day we die as any other day we experience. By no means am I attempting to exempt myself from this lack of awareness. I believe that regardless of the “memento mori” poster on some people’s wall or practices of praying thanks to God for each new morning, the subconscious brain immediately upon waking simply assumes that today will not be the day it stops firing. That’s pretty profound when you think about it so I recommend taking some time to mull over that before proceeding to the next paragraph as I will do myself before writing it :)
This common assumption, however, was uprooted by the experiences of the “pandemic.” Unfortunately, those roots have since weaseled their way back into the safe, comforting soil of surface-level thought that breeds assumptions in the first place, but that is a discussion for another day as well. Regardless, I believe it was the forced upheaval of not just the aforementioned assumption but many others that led a plethora of my peers as well as myself to lose their footing in reality. I count myself lucky that I had to come to grips with the seemingly random dispersal of shortcomings dealt by the universe on a daily basis by watching my mother go through her treatment. If you know Kimi Cottmeyer she is one of the last people on the list of humans that deserves cancer, if the higher powers of the universe had such a list. Nonetheless, I was forced to grapple with the idea that anybody, regardless of perceived virtue, socioeconomic status, or any other variable to describe a human, could die on any given day. In the same way that an all powerful owner rubs its dog’s face in its own mess after pooping on the floor, we were painfully forced to confront our own mortality without any warning. The method was not necessarily the most ideal however I do believe that given our increasingly comfortable existence it was a healthy part of the process of becoming a better human, if utilized in an effective manner. As I touched upon with the analogy of needy roots desperately attempting to crawl back into that comforting soil, many people neglected the opportunity to grow themselves through such a jarring process. It is for this reason that we find ourselves even more weak and isolated as a society than we were before all this nonsense occured. The reason for this is that we missed a massive opportunity to learn from a collective dissolution of safe assumptions in the rush to quickly build them back up for a sense of “normalcy.”
The worldly scale of assumptions was just the tip of the iceberg. As I hunted deeper and deeper I found the tentacles of harmful assumptions wrapped around almost everything. It is for this reason that I was so intimidated by writing this piece in the first place. However, I think the most effective way of slicing the infestation of shallow conclusion jumping is to separate it into the two realms of reality that define our lives since the time of Aristotle: object and subject. I have already made my best attempt at defining the most pressing assumptions we make on an objective, worldly scale. Although there are many, many more, I believe that by at least planting the seed of consideration about the most unifying assumption we make about existence itself, a reader may atleast get the gist of what I’m getting at without an hour long thesis. The assumptions that brought me the farthest down the rabbit hole, however, were those we make about ourselves.
I’ve been doing a lot of reading lately. If anybody reading this is from my first semester at CU, you’ll know I somehow picked up a reputation for being “that kid who reads.” This was always confusing to me considering, if you’re someone who knows me from elsewhere, you know I’ve never been too keen on reading literature. I have always loved to write but I did not connect those two passions until recently, which to me, is a fascinating phenomenon. I digress. Through reading, I’ve found myself doing a lot of thinking, or at least what I would have once considered thinking. Many of the books I read have a basis in philosophy and tend to force me to challenge not only my thoughts on the book or life in general, but the processes that brought me to this thought in the first place. As a result, I have been thinking a lot about where my thoughts come from and even that pattern of thought is ironically a byproduct of reading Jordan Peterson’s book. If it’s not obvious, what I’m trying to say is that many of our thoughts are not our own and I’m having a hard time even quantifying my perspective on the matter considering this thought was not originally my own either! It’s a bit of a paradox but for the sake of the discussion the reader has to come to a mutual agreement with me that what I’m saying is unique enough to my own existence to refrain from being plagiarism of thought. In order for this agreement to proceed on common ground we have to utilize the very tool of assumption! It is because of this process that we are able to exist as a civilized society and by no means do i wish to tear that down through a meta-analysis of thought. However, I believe that by going through the dark forest of realization within our own psyche in the hunt for where our true, original thoughts come from we could speed up the process of true global progress. However, if you’re not willing to make that journey through the unknown then you should probably stop reading now!
Clearly, claiming that the majority of our thoughts are not our own is quite the abrasive statement. Many would quickly assume a defensive position of their own ability to cognate. However, I only came to firmly believe in this jarring reality after doing some of my own introspection. As it stands I am still in the forest wandering about, constantly uncovering hidden treasures within the underbrush of self-bias. In this journey I found a grassy pasture within my mind to sit down and truly think about the manner in which I acquire ideas, discoveries, etc. In the same way that I find a cool mushroom on my walk through the moist mountains of Georgia, I believe that this is the method for my own thinking and that of others, whether we realize it or not. As with many of my other posts I encourage anyone reading this to truly sit alone with their own Being and have a deeply inquisitive conversation. In this case, I encourage one to truly ask yourself, with as little bias as possible, “How many of my thoughts are truly original and only stem from my own brain?” The troubling, yet eye-opening answer in my case was not too many. The great Carl Jung once said, “Thinking is difficult. That is why most people judge.” Throwing it back to the Loki analogy, if someone were to print out a complete record of all your thoughts, what percentage would be anything other than judgement and regurgitation of something we heard from someone else. When undergoing this thought experiment on myself I was initially dismayed to find that much of what I say is simply something I acquired from someone wiser.
Once you get past the initial wave of fear that arises from an observation of this sort, the next logical conclusion is the realization of a strategy to get better at “thinking.” The first step of overcoming any problem is first acceptance, which as I warned previously, is no easy task. However, barring that you have made it this far and are capable of such vulnerable self reflection I want to use these last few minutes of the post to discuss the bright side of such a profound discovery. In the same way that the first step to becoming physically fit is accepting the extra pounds and alcoholism one has adopted in recent years, there is always a silver lining to being brutally honest with oneself. Just like with physical health, one’s mental health can also be improved through consistent practice and learning. The term “mental health” has become a one sided term nowadays used simply to define lazy self-inflictions on the mind such as depression and anxiety. However, when I use the term I mean to suggest the literal strength of one’s mind to complete tasks that we identify with all things non-physical, primarily thought. Contrary to popular belief, and similar to the mentality I discussed in my very first post, all aspects of the mind body and soul detoritate if not taken care of. We tend to only acknowledge the physical form considering its the most obvious when not taken care of due to visual cues such as fat. However, if you really pay attention you can feel such cues within a lack of care given to one’s mind when talking to someone who has neglected to exercise the muscle of the brain. This phenomenon is painfully obvious in the discourse around politics and society nowadays. If ever you find yourself in conversation with someone only capable of giving surface level judgments of events and repetition of dogma from those in power, it may not be worth a conversation at all. This should go without saying, but that goes for all humans despite one’s identity. Regardless, the reason for this is that when acutely observed, the symptoms of a weak mind are as easily to spot as a weak body attempting to lift a weight that they have yet to train hard enough to get off the rack. As harsh as it may seem, in the dualistic reality we all cohabit, this also allows for the other side of the equation to shine just as bright. When the work has been put into one’s mind it can be felt in the very core of one’s soul. If ever you’ve listened to someone and gotten an unexplainable feeling that they are simply “smart” it is most likely a symptom of a trained mind. I am not talking about the observation of senses such as sound and sight than can lead someone to sound smart or look sophisticated. I mean to draw attention to that feeling in the very core of your being when listening to someone who so clearly knows what they’re talking about. It’s a non-bodily, difficult-to-describe sensation but if you’ve ever felt it you know exactly what I’m talking about. Keeping with the theme of duality, it is easier to explain when described in contrast to someone who is so obviously unaware of their own Being and desperately attempting to latch onto ideas proposed by those stronger. I’ve attempted to put this sensation into words before but it's almost closer to a primal smell that you get from someone who obviously neglects to take care of their soul and vice versa for someone who does put in that effort.
I clearly got a little carried away just there so I’ll attempt to bring us home by rounding the discussion back to assumptions. Everyday we make assumptions about the world and ourselves. That is perfectly fine considering many of them keep us alive and capable of coexistence. However, many assumptions we make hold us back from breaking new ground and giving the human race the full breadth of the potential we have to offer as an individual. I encourage anyone reading this to not shy away from challenging those assumptions no matter how scary it may be. It may temporarily erode some of the ground from under your feet but the assumptions that you feel are worthwhile can still stay. There will be many other assumptions, however, when analysed with a truly unbiased microscope will be evidently harmful. You then have a choice to willingly ignore such assumptions and go on living your comfortable, ignorant life or look them in the eye and fight them for the very essence of your Being. The choice is always that of the individual but as with many of my posts I encourage certain things so as to increase the collective wellbeing of society as a whole. I genuinely believe if we were all honest with ourselves about the assumptions we make we could practice the art of original thought and come up with some creative escapes from this shit show we’ve created for ourselves. If not us then who?